So here’s the thing: I’ve obviously been gone for a while. I haven’t meant to be, so I’m very sorry. But if it’s any consolation, I have a very good reason.

During Christmas Leigh was working in Los Angeles for a States-based Japanese company. My semester didn’t end until around December 15th, so as soon as I could I flew out to L.A. to spend Christmas with my lovely wife.

I found myself in trouble as soon as I got there. First, I couldn’t find her office. I tried looking her up in the building directory but I couldn’t find her name, and unfortunately I wasn’t getting any reception on my cell phone, either. I finally realized that she was listed under maiden name. I felt really stupid.

After I finally found her I had to wait in her office forever because she was in charge of organizing the company Christmas party. Although, while I was waiting for her I met a guy named Ellis that was pretty damn entertaining.

While I was waiting in Leigh’s office, I heard some commotion coming from the party. I stuck my head out to catch a peek, and I was shocked to see twelve guys waving around guns. I was able to sneak up to the roof of the building and use a walkie-talkie to call for help, but get this: the dispatcher thought I was making a phony phone call. I mean, you’d think I was ordering a pizza instead of reporting criminals! And when the police finally showed up some jackass named “Dwayne” tried to tell me I was helping the criminals. The nerve of the guy!

Anyhow, I was finally able to save Leigh and get out of there, but not before two FBI agents died in a helicopter crash and the bottom three floors of the building exploded. I did strangle one guy with a tow chain and push one of the bad guys off the fortieth floor of the building. So there’s that.

So that was my Christmas. I don’t even want to tell you what happened on New Year’s.